Who we are: Mission & Goals

We are a 501(c)3 organization dedicated to raising awareness of eating disorders in the dance community through online eating disorder education, resources and social media awareness projects. 

Our Goals:

To connect members of the dance community with members of the recovery community.

Build supportive dance environments, understanding and safe for those vulnerable to body image, and eating disorders.

Maintain awareness of recovery efforts, research and new treatments to the public members of the dance community.

Encourage healthy self-image, and body image, “progress not perfection” in all we say and do.

Raise awareness of recovery and balanced lifestyle choices through image galleries, forums, blogs, articles, focus groups.

Create an online support network, and recovery inspiration; all in one place.

You Are: A Recovery Poem

You Are:
Not your disease.
Not your choices.
Not your past hurts.
Not your future dreams.
You are more than all of that.
You Are:
Not your relationships.  
Not the mistakes you’ve made.
Not someone defined by outside sources.
Not the thoughts in your mind.
Not the skin on your body.
You are more than what you can wrap your mind around.
You Are:
Not what others think of you.
Not what others feel.
Not what others expect.
Not another person.
Not a disappointment.
Not worthless.
Not invisible.
Not your talent.
You are much more than you can wrap your mind around.
You are free.
You are.
You.

The Answer's In Your Mind

What if I told you it’s in your mind? An invalidating statement if I’ve ever heard one (which I have) but my intentions are good, I promise.

Hear me out….

There’s nothing out there that can change the life you live, challenges you face, and happiness you seek. No part, school, program, or scholarship will make you more, better or good enough. Going on pointe or not going on pointe you’re still the same. You’re you, that can’t change.

The acceptance and love for yourself and who you are is waiting for you in your body. Always has been, always will. You aren’t going to find yourself outside of yourself. No person, place or thing can fulfill the longing to be whole. Period.

whats going on inside your head

The answer is in your mind.

You can have everything: job, car, boyfriend or girlfriend, talent, fame, hair and nails; and be totally miserable.

It won’t bring true happiness because you still hate yourself.

At first, I found self searching the, “You have the strength inside you”, “Your heart is your greatest companion”, or “ Just stop and listen to the soul”; a bunch of mumbo jumbo.

A little hocus-pocus if you ask me. (Color me cynical)

Searching takes energy, and at the moment you might be laying in bed, or standing in front of the toilet, or sitting on the floor with a sharp object.

war

The last thing you want to do is look inward because that’s where the demons live.

Demon’s of pain and agony are trapped inside your mind, your heart, your stomach. Maybe that’s why you’re not hungry; there’s no room.

But there’s hope… don’t worry. I won’t leave you like this.

Keep reading….

The demons don’t belong there. They were born from a lie you are holding onto; it’s killing you.

The demons–let’s call them negative thoughts– are taking up too much space in your mind that could be filled by something else. They’ve hijacked you, and don’t want to leave.

So, what do you do?

You could release them, talk to your treatment team, take the medication….or you can dance with your demons.

Are you willing to let go? I can’t let go. Are you willing to risk, and take the biggest step towards eating disorder recovery? Maybe.

You have the power. It’s your life. But it doesn’t feel that way.

It’s all in your mind.  I’m scared.feed-myself-fight-the-illness

Let’s take the next step. Okay

Disclaimer: There are people out there that can help you through this process..it’s scary I know. I’ve been there.

Take a chance, you won’t regret it!

GET HELP NOW

What Would Your Life Look Like Without Your Eating Disorder?

What would your life look like without your eating disorder?

A loaded question; I know.

Instead, let us start with something simple.

Do you have a morning routine? I’m not talking about get up, brush teeth, hair, get a drink of water….yada, yada, yada…..

More like a thought routine-thoughts that pop into your mind the moment sleep fades and awareness opens its eyes.

For example: What will I do for myself today?  I can do this!  I am excited to see what today holds! It may be tough but I have overcome so much already. Shut up, Ed!tired dancer

Or is it more like: Oh no, not again…! I will breath in and out until I can go back to bed, hide under the covers so I don’t have to see myself or think. I can stay warm and safe. Unfortunately, the world beckons me 🙁  God, is that what I really look like? I’m screwed!

Feeling inadequate and broken can be part of life ,but does not have to be your life.

It had been a part of my life since I’d met Ed when I  was 17 and lost my professional ballet career; I trusted a voice that told me, “If you can just stay thin, you can hold happiness.”

Liar.

Once under its spell, I became obsessed with my body, perfection, a happiness that didn’t exist because it was contingent upon a weight that wasn’t even physically possible for my body.

Such a liar.

For years it seemed recovery was a permanent uphill climb. Some said it would get easier as I grew stronger and built my recovery voice. True. The kind of truth that hurts. It hurts to admit I doubted myself almost the entire time I fought Ed, however, that didn’t stop me from fighting, falling down, getting back up and fighting some more. Just because I doubted myself, didn’t mean I was going to give up.

It takes a stubborn, determined person to recover. It also takes a stubborn, determined person to stay sick.

Life with my eating disorder meant my thought routine was jacked, warped, infected with negativity. Mornings were the worst, they were…..UGH!

Now back to my original question…

What would your life look like without your eating disorder? How would your thoughts change, relationships, routines etc…

What would you live for if you weren’t trying to be skinny?

Think about it….

 

17 Daily Affirmations For Dancers in Eating Disorder Recovery

Good Morning! Happy Monday!

It’s the start of a new day, a new week–which may hold its own challenges and obstacles. Guaranteed. What I need most, and some of you can relate, is something positive to say to myself. Something that can easily be stored in my brain, hopefully towards to front.

Affirmations. I did them in treatment with my therapist and groups. Right now, I’m looking at an old handout from when I was at Remuda Ranch back in 2002. A plain sheet of white paper, wrinkled at the corners, clear tape on the top where it must have been hanging onto a mirror, lists 17 statements. Truths about my body, and myself. They’re powerful, positive and so desperately needed to penetrate my doubting heart.

Here they are:

I Accept My Changing Body.

My Body Deserves The Nutrition It Receives.

I Respect My Beautiful Body.

My Body Is Not the Enemy.

I Love My Body.

I Will Treat My Body As My Best Friend.

My Body Does Not Define Me.

My Body Is A Gift From God.

I Am Worthwhile And Lovable Just Breathing.

I am Worthy & Deserving Of A Good Life.

It Is Perfectly Ok To Be Imperfect.

I Accept All My Feelings And Express Them In A Healthy Way.

I Am A Strong And Powerful Women In Recovery.

I Have A Voice And Deserve To Be Heard.

I Release Things And Ideas That Do Not Serve Me.

I Am A Unique And Precious Human Being.

I Will Do What It Takes, I Will Persevere, I Am Worthwhile, I Will Face My Fear!

Keep Recovery and Dance On!